Is it Enough to Die?
by Ki-Gon Tsu
Summary: Harry's had enough. He walks out on his destiny, leaving the wizarding world in extreme peril. Will he come back in enough time to save them all and deal with Dumbledore? Or will he wash his hands of them for what Dumbledore did to him?


Disclaimer: Harry Potter + me + my story Harry Potter not being mine.

Author's Note: Please Read and Review. Constructively of course. Should I finish this fic? Let me know!

_And I want to believe you when you tell me that it'll be okay,_

_and I try to believe you, but I don't. . ._

It was a very dark evening and the close of a rather dull day when Harry Potter sat down on the edge of his bed to read the letters that an owl had left on his bed earlier. Unfortunately, Harry hadn't been there to receive the letters, as he'd been outside in the backyard doing yardwork, of his own volition. He did anything now-adays to keep his mind off of his fifth year at Hogwarts.

Sighing at the pile of letters in his hands, he began to gingerly open one. Why didn't his friends understand that he just needed space? Why didn't Remus and Dumbledore realize that he couldn't heal with people constantly badgering him to 'get over it', or badgering him about keeping up appearances because he had a job to do. Lifting the first flap of the letter, Harry began reading as he unfolded the rest of it.

_Dear Harry,_

_I hope this letter finds you at least in comfortable spirits, if not happy ones. I regret the loss of your godfather Harry, but I hope that you will not grieve for long, because you have life to continue with. I'm sure that Sirius would've wanted it that way. I am sorry that I did not share the news of your life with you sooner, but hopefully you will understand that I was doing my best to protect you. Please accept my apologies. Please trust me when I say that everything will be all right, sooner, or later._

_Harry, I want you to write me should you have any visions, or your scar starts hurting. The guard will continue around your house, and Bill, Remus, or Tonks will check in on your periodically to make sure that your relatives are treating you as they should be. _

_Once again, my apologies and truest condolences,_

_Albus Dumbledore_

Harry frowned at the letter. _I hope that you will not grieve for long because you have life to continue with._

_Your plans, you mean._ Harry thought bitterly. _All you care about is my being your "ultimate-weapon". I'm not even sure I believe that rubbish._

Harry scanned the rest of the letter again. _Please trust me when I say that everything will be all right, sooner, or later._

_Yeah, they'll be all right for you or the rest of the wizarding world. . ._ Harry inwardly scoffed. _I'll either be dead or mentally insane. Who knows. . .you might drive me so over the edge that I'll become the next Voldemort. Wouldn't that be ironic?_

The last was thought in such a sarcastic tone that Harry just had to chuckle slightly. Deciding he would ignore Albus Dumbledore for the time being, he picked up the second letter.

_Harry,_

_Hey mate! How's it goin'? Guess what! Mom and Dad surprised all of us by asking us what we wanted as a spur-of-the-moment gift. I think they're trying to keep our childhood instilled in us before it's really and truly gone. I have no problem with that! Apparently, they've been saving up money for this for a long time. They bought me a Nimbus 2001! And they bought Fred and George a joint gift that they can use in their buisiness, and they bought you something too, Harry! But it's too big to send by owl post so we'll have to wait until you come here for your birthday before we give it to you. _

_Mum's complained heavily to Dumbledore, and you will be here by your birthday. Not long to spend in that hell-hole. Cheer up mate, life'll look up soon! No, we haven't heard anything about Voldemort, but I'll tell you if I can find anything out. . .Dumbledore or no Dumbledore. Hermione's here with us, and we going to see if Mum won't badger Dumbledore about letting you come here earlier. Write back, Harry. I haven't heard from you all summer, and I know I'm dense of a sorts, but, even I know when stuffs wrong. Let us know you're alive._

_Ron_

Harry sighed once again. It wasn't that he hated his friends, he just didn't want to talk to anyone, or be around anyone right now. He didn't even want to leave the Dursley's this summer. He wanted to be truly alone. He couldn't bear to see his friends before he attempted his escape from the wizarding world. He wasn't safe in Dumbledore's care. He always seemed to be safer outside of it, and not only that, he could have more freedom when not around the wizarding world. He was tired of being used for anyone and everyone's purposes. He wanted out of his jail-cell-life, and he was going to have it soon. Luckily, he'd been practicing wandless magic, and he'd been able to accomplish a few small spells, and also two of the larger spells he'd wanted learned.

Shaking his head, he shoved the rest of the letters to the side. He was getting out of here tonight, and he was going to do it quickly. Standing, he grabbed his wand, then cast a wandless packing spell. As he dressed, he put his wand in his backpocket. Setting his black spectacles in their proper place, Harry paused only to grab a piece of parchment, a quill, and an ink well from the air where they were flying towards his trunk. As far as he'd come to understand, the Ministry could not detect wandless magic, so he was safe. Siting down, he wrote out a letter, and several of its copies, to Dumbledore, Ron, Hermione, and Remus.

_Dear friends, and dillusional father-head figures,_

_I am sorry to be the bearer of such bad news, but this must be done. I'm sick and tired of living the life that Dumbledore has carefully mapped out for me, and I can't do it anymore. Therefore, the way I see it, this War is a battle between two "gangs." Yes, gangs. Dumbledore and The Order, vs. Voldemort and the Death Eaters. I can no longer be apart of this, unless there comes a day when you recognize my right to be a human being and not a weapon. Although, that day will probably come to late._

_Ron, Hermione, you were and are and will always be my best friends. I'm sorry for this. Take care of yourselves. And for haven's sake Ron, you know you're in love with the girl. Shut your trap and ask her out on a date. And Hermione? Learn to swallow your pride, and accept._

_Remus, I'll have you know I lump you in the friends category. I'm glad you've been there for me since third year, it's meant a great deal to me. I'm not sure you'll ever know how much. I'm sorry for what I must do, but hopefully, you will understand. Take care of yourself, Remus._

_Dumbledore, you great git. I hope you're happy with the results of your meddling. I've done my part, now it's time for you to do yours. Step up and fight this battle the dirty way. If Voldemort gets dirty, you get dirtier. War isn't kind. Learn that, and you'll likely win. Fight like you're fighting now, and well. . .I won't say. Please don't attempt to come after me. Were you to catch me, the consquences might be dire._

_Harry Potter_

It was this letter that Harry sent off with Hedwig, and finally, Harry packed those last things in his trunk, pulled out his invisibility cloak and shrunk his trunk with yet another wandless spell. He tucked his trunk into the pocket of his jeans, and wrapped himself in the invisibility cloak. Sneaking out through his window, Harry snuck over the roof to the back of a house and climbed into a tree. From there, he climbed down, and jumped over the fence into the back yard of his "back-neighbour".

Creeping around to the front of their house, Harry grabbed his wand from his back pocket, he held his arm out. As The Knight pulled up, and then shot off with a bang, Mundungus Fletcher rose out of his deep sleep in the Dursley's front yard with a surprised yelp.

He awoke to the wards monitor going wild, and hung his head. He was going to be in such trouble. Several minutes later, Order members appeared to find Mundungus as white as a sheet.

"Uh. . ."

Remus Lupin, one of the first to be there, moved silently over to Mundungus. Staring down at him, he finally spoke.

"What happened?"

Mundungus gulped.

"I-uh-I scanned the house. It-uh-it appears that Harry's run off."

Remus eyes blazed a bright yellow, before the wizard forced himself to calm down.

"And you didn't catch him, because. . .?"

Mundungus looked down at his shoes.

"I was asleep."

While a red-headed man attacked Mundungus at full run, Remus turned disgustedly from Mundungus and turned to the others.

"Let's spread out and find Harry. Now!"

Remus turned a blind eye to young Ronald Weasley, now 6'1", beating the daylights out of Mundungus. It was only when Hermione tried pulling him off, did Remus help her.

End of chapter. Read, Review, let me know what you think. Where should Harry end up? I have an idea, but I want my reader's input! Tell, tell, tell!


End file.
